Archive | May, 2009

Double Whammy Cheating!

13 May

It’s been five weeks since my last post. (Almost sounds like a confessional doesn’t it?) So, after five weeks you’d think I’d be writing something profound or highly creative, and while what I’m about to share with you IS highly creative… I didn’t write it. My ten year old son did, and I hope you enjoy it. Now you know what I mean by “Double Whammy Cheating”. I got you here thinking I’d written something funny or poignant and now I’m bragging about my kid and almost making you feel obligated to keep reading. So, without any further adieu, his story:

My Imaginary World

In my imaginary world things can occur that would NEVER occur in the real world. Did you know that you cannot die in my imaginary world? But, my imaginary friends can. I have a thousand million imaginary friends: war friends, defense friends, actual friends, cool friends and cute friends.

My war friends defend our world from the X’s. They are the most important part of my imaginary world. Without my war friends my peanut protected planet would be destroyed by the X’s. The X’s are alien destroyers, they destroy by using destruction rays that disintegrate everything they touch, turning the object they hit into ashes like the coals left over from a fire. The X’s can also shape-shift.

My war friends all have their unique powers. Flame Orb, one of my war friends, can make balls of fire to hurl at the X’s. Vortexas is just like a black hole, he can suck in any object and annihilate it by ripping it apart. The leader of my war friends is a robot called Sword Destroyer 9000, or SD9 for short. He is a transformer. He can alter his appearance from a robot to a laser sword in a millisecond and he can easily acquire anything he wants.

My defense friends exist in my imaginary castle, and they only battle the X’s if they invade the castle. The X’s usually don’t get in the castle more than once a year, but when they do, they are destroyed by my defense friends immediately. Kaapow! The X’s would like to get their hands on the energy crystals that control my castle, and use these jumping crystals to communicate with their mother ship to obliterate my planet. Their mother ship is the most destructive alien ship in the entire galaxy. When my defense friends are not working, they pull pranks on my cool, cute and actual friends, the usual stuff like the banana cream pie in the face, the bucket of water over the door trick, and the switcheroo.

I have to take care of my cool, cute and actual friends like mother bird cares for her babies. I assist them by helping them to learn to be either a defense friend or a war friend to replace the ones who are mortally wounded by the X’s. I’d invite you to visit my imaginary world but you don’t have the special goggles.

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